Los Scandalous in Los Angeles

As my flight made it finally approach to LAX (Los Angeles International) there was not much a sigh of relief, the sky was orange and blue, I forgot about the supreme air quality of this great city.

Barely three weeks since I made my return to this city of Angels, I find myself trapped in traffic, pissed off and angry. My road rage is back again at full force. The radio stations don't play music anymore, everyone is trying to sell you something and everyone is trying to be the number 1 station in the southland. I have more of a work out on my lower legs, as I continually press the brakes and the other foot on the accelerator. Stop and go, stop and go, stop and turn, turn and stop. Millions of people are coming to this city everyday, majority are waiting to become the next big thing, whether its in music or acting. You see these people everywhere: Your waiter is waiting to become the lead singer in a band film. Your car deal is a part time Porn star. Your apartment manager is probably watching that porn star on some adult movie. The guy skateboarding at the beach, has been in several movies and has a house up on the hills, but you wouldn't know that or assume, because, his jeans are worn and shoes are dirty, but he drives a brand new Audi. Even the News Casters are giving you a show, they open up the nightly news with crime, local news and the great weather and they end with that great smile, "have a Good Night" Everything is great in LA, that is the attitude. High gas prices "everything is great in LA" Police Brutality, "ah, LA!" High cost of living "LA, my kinda town"

Later during my first week home, I met up with some old friends and suddenly realized that not only do I not fit into their world of marriage, children, but I have been falling off the marker, as some of my friends are the new members of the American homeowners society; I guess I can't take part of the full Membership of their Country Club. Everyday I was reminded that "well, everyone can't get up and travel around, some of us have to get up in the morning and go to work!" As though, I was living in a world without the realities of work and income. My travel buddy of mine, told me that I shouldn't blame myself for my situation. And he reminded me that we did took GUTS and courage. But, my dear friend knows that the sad reality is that most people won't be rewarded for such GUTS or courage, they overall want to see a return to the normalcy of things and life.

I return to a place, where I can easily find low-paying work, where I am asked to dress professionally, and have a winning personality, as though you are making millions of dollars, while my check shows a pay rate of $10.00 an hour. After work, I do a 6 mile walk along the beach, any reason doing so? To stay in or get into shape and plus, I really don't have much to do around this large city. I can't afford to drive around and I don't really have any place to drive to. My family members live in different areas of town and trying to drop by and visit everyone of them............well, with the current gas prices of $2.79 a gallon, we can chat by phone or send an e-mail. Also since being back, I lack the desire to explore or take pictures, this place is home for me and I seriously want to get away from this place. I am sure many people (and friends) go through this same feeling when you return home from seeing new places and people and suddenly you are brought back to a place where you don't belong. That is what I am going through right now.

Though, I have many friends in other places who kindly offer a place for me to go. But, having to decide on going to Boise, Phoenix, and Portland, I'm going crazy trying to figure out what place I would go to first or if at all. Many these places I just mentioned, I lived some years ago. I worry that I am chasing a past life that might not exist.

Nevertheless, the adventure continues. . . . . . . .